After performing "We Can Do It" from The Producers with my brother, I feel that I have let myself down. I tried singing in a way that I was unsure of and ended up not giving a good performance in my eyes. I love The Producers as a show and will not likely play Max Bialystock at any point in my life- though I have played the Wolf from Into the Woods, so who actually knows what might happen. This is theatre after all.
After practicing the song in a different way for almost a week now, I am hoping to redeem myself. I care about the opinions of my peers and professors, but I care most about my opinion of what I do and I wish that I could go back to last Friday and do the performance differently. This level of regret doesn't come often to me, but when it does I take it very seriously, and this means beating myself up for days- sometimes weeks. I understand that this is not conducive to improving my craft, but I can't help feeling this way. Be assured that I am working on cutting down the time I feel bad about messing up a performance, however I'm not to the point where I can mess up and leave the bad energy behind once I'm done with the experience.
That being said, I will do what I've been practicing tomorrow in hopes that I will feel a bit better. I've decided to go with more still energy instead of moving around like a cartoon character. I have also decided to belt and use a more legit sound when going up to the higher notes. Interestingly enough, I haven't found any women performing this duet as either part so this could be a sign I'm doing something unforgivable by the gods of theatre. Only tomorrow will tell.
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